To Charis's birthmother-
I'm thinking of you today as I often do on the eve of big moments in Charis's life.  She starts to kindergarten in three days.  It will the the first day of many, many years of schooling.  Before I brought her home I promised the government of your country I would see that she had a good education and so we begin.  My parents valued education so much and I value it too.  I pray it will help give her options and open doors and will help her use the gifts God has given her.  I wish you could know how smart she is already and how anxious she is to learn everything she can!  I wonder if she got her bend toward perfectionism from you-I don't think it comes from me:). I know there will be some difficult days as we both learn how to function in the school system-there already have been a couple of bumps.  But we will both be fine-I plan to volunteer in her classroom so I can have a better sense of this new world she is in.  As always, I am eternally grateful for the privilege of being the mother of this smart, funny, loving compassionate child.  I pray somehow you know we have a wonderful life together.
Lori

Five years ago today we boarded the plane for China.  It seems like yesterday, it seems like it has been forever.  It's good that I didn't know what difficult days were in store for me in China, but I also could never have anticipated the joy and love my beautiful daughter have brought to my life.  Thank you to the One who made us a family and continues to bless us with His love.  I reminded her last night that she was truly a princess - that she was the daughter of the King of Kings.  I pray that fact always brings the joy to her eyes that I saw last night!!!

Already I am saying "Where have the years gone??"  My little girl has finished preschool and is preparing to enter kindergarten.  She is no longer a toddler - she is a bike riding beginning reader who thinks so deeply is quite frankly scares me sometimes!  When I was recently lamenting her growing up she said to me "But mommy, if I never grow up, I'll never have babies and you'll never get to be a grandma.  Wouldn't that make you sad??"

 

 

Tonight I looked into the eyes of a 2 year old who recently came into foster care with a friend of mine.  What I saw was hauntingly familiar- not that I can honestly say I remember when Charis had that look in her eyes but I see it every time I look at pictures of our first days together.  It's a look of terror, bewilderment and a little relief all mixed together.  I wanted to take this little one in my arms and tell her it's alright-she's safe now and my friend will take good care of her.  And she will, but how long until this little ones life gets turned upside down again?  Lord, I'm coming to you tonight asking you to be with this little one, and all the other little ones in the world who wonder who will love them, who will care for them, who will feed them.  Let them feel Your love and Your presence and Lord show us how to be you hands for those in need.  Please bless those who care for orphans, children in foster care and other caretakers.  And Lord please give a special blessing to all those waiting for forever families.

I just came across this excerpt from “Instant Mom” by Nia Vardalos and it took me back to when I met my daughter four and a half years ago – almost eerie how similar it was! 

“we can see a little brown-haired girl is in a social worker's (for me, a nanny) arms. And as we walk toward the group, the little girl turns and looks at me.

At me. …….. Everything goes quiet. I hear nothing at all. All I think is, "Oh, I found you."

Because now I know who I have been waiting for. I know exactly why the other processes didn't work. I know I was supposed to wait for this little girl……As I cradle her, I can't hear anything. I am looking at my daughter. Finally. And I feel a peacefulness come over me like I have never known. I waited a long time for her and she is worth every minute of anxiety. I am holding my little girl and just inhaling her scent. She is apprehensive, not sure what's happening today, and she clings to me and hides in my neck. I kiss her and whisper in her ear that everything will be OK. I tell her I love her.” –

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